Photo courtesy Fe Ilya, www.flickr.com

Don’t worry. I’m not going to tell you to hug a tree. But I am here to prove that it’s okay to break the norm and wear a green heart on your sleeve instead of a red one.

And no, you don’t have to dance barefoot the woods to become “one” with the earth.

Say “hey” to your house plants. Water those potted plants you’ve forgotten about…you know, the one hanging from your living room ceiling that Mom gave you. Paying more attention to the earth’s little beauties can help you take your mind off things (and people!) that aggravate you during the day. If you practice taking better care of plants just by watering them, there’s a good chance you’ll start taking better care of yourself, too. Think: symbolism. We all need affection, water and sunlight for growth and survival.

Go for a run or walk outside instead of hitting the treadmill at the gym. If unpleasant weather keeps you from going outside, do some kind of exercise that doesn’t involve machines that use a lot of electricity. There’s nothing wrong with going crazy dancing around the room with your iPod!

Make an eco-friendly cleaning solution. Mix two parts hydrogen peroxide (a natural, safe antibacterial agent) and one part water with a few drops lavender and/or peppermint oi (any essential oil will work). Pour into a spray bottle and use as a cleaner for kitchen and bathroom. Also, try replacing a harsh cleanser powder with baking soda. You’ll get a fresh, clean scent instead of a bleachy odor.

Turn off the faucet. We’ve all been guilty of letting the water run at some point. Most of the time, we do it unconsciously. Sometimes, we do it just because we can. But to help save money and the planet, try brushing your teeth with a designated amount of water in a glass or canteen. You’ll be surprised to see how little water you’ll need.

Visit a recycled book store. While e-books prevent the waste of paper and ink, many people just don’t want to stop relishing the smell of paperbacks and hard covers. Once in a while, check out a used book store for a noseful of nostalgia. It’s a great way to save paper and cash.

These are just a handful of things you can do to show love and gratitude for Mother Earth, who shares her amazing creatures with us!

Boy bands come and go like FroYo flavors of the week. Thankfully, however, Tommy Mac of the former band No Authority, has found a way to keep things hot and tasty. We bring him to HollyPinafore.org just for you. Why? Well, because not only was he a heartthrob back in the day, but he’s pretty darn inspiring and has great respect for the ladies. This guy is one fun entrepreneur who everyone can take a few tips from. This dude REALLY knows how to live the delicious life. Here’s the story about his fun, fabulous food web show, “SnackyShack.” Take it away, Tommy Boy:

Hi there, my name is Tommy McCarthy. I used to be in a boy band. I have to admit, it was a heck of a lot of fun. I saw the country, experienced things that I sometimes can’t even believe when I recollect the stories, ate delicious food from pretty much every city in the U.S., and did it all on Michael Jackson’s and Madonna’s collective dime. Well, sort of. We had a shit deal, financially, but the perks were pretty awesome. Between dining at the finest restaurants, we’d have to make do with “gas station cuisine,” as my brothers call it. As you can imagine, once you’re a seasoned veteran of the road, you become accustomed to the lifestyle and your palate takes a turn for the, well, I’d like to say for the BEST, but then again, you may say “potato” while I say “bacon,” so it’s subjective, I suppose. I digress…

This isn’t a piece about riding horses at Neverland Ranch or giving Britney Spears a Chris Rock book (if that isn’t funny to you, do some research) while we were on tour with her, or about how I danced with MC Hammer a short 5 years after I was quoted in the Sumter Daily Item (my hometown paper) as a 13-year-old pre-pubescent kid in South Carolina dreaming of dancing with his idol that “Yeah, I think I could do that.” It isn’t about playing in front of crowds of 80,000 people, pouring champagne on the Vice President of Reebok’s head in our limo, or standing up to a 7’7” bouncer at a club in New York because I was under-age and he wouldn’t let me in to take a leak (even though Eric got in with a fake I.D. and I was older than him… I was really irked by that!). In fact, it’s not even about the Gold record on my wall or the fact that one of the vocal groups that I idolized in high school (All-4-One) actually asked ME to help them write on their last album, though it DID become their first single off of that record, and “Theo” from The Cosby Show played the Dad in the video! The truth is, this article is all about how my crazy life has led me to the point to where my love of food and all things “snacky” has somehow led me to create, produce and host a comedy cooking show.

If we’re being honest, I suppose the show is really more about our guests and their projects than it is the food, but, what better way to make someone feel at home than to actually HAVE them at your home and plow them with delicious food and adult beverages? Wait a minute, that sounds way more sinister than it really is. You see, when we were on the Nickelodeon All That Music and More Tour back in 2001, our bus took a detour into the woods. Sounds like the beginning of a creepy horror film, right? Well, it’s not, but it WAS where that little memory became lodged in my brain that popped up when the synapses started firing in my brain last year after we had our first guests on SnackyShack. To be honest, Joe (our director) invited them over to shoot. When I came up with “SnackyShack”, I was simply endeavoring for it to be a blog. I moved in with Joe, he had a camera, he wanted to shoot, we started shooting (the early videos are EXTREMELY cheesy, literally AND figuratively), and then the first guests came. That changed everything.

So, here we are in the woods, in a tour bus, driving God knows where. Finally, we pull up to a beautiful, yet modest house, surrounded by a gorgeous woodland property. It actually reminded me of my McCarthy Grandparents’ place up in Massachusetts! The only difference being, my grandparents had an old water tower that I would sneak through the gate to climb and THIS place had a private airplane runway. We’d arrived at the home of John Garabedian. If you don’t know who that is, he hosted the nationally-syndicated “Open House Party” from 1987 until 2007, if Wikipedia is accurate. Thanks, also, to Wikipedia, I just realized that John lives in Massachusetts (on tour, you never REALLY know what city you are in, you just pretend), which MAY explain the earlier reference to the McCarthy house. Anyway, John welcomed us into his home, and led us down to the basement, where we proceeded to tape for his radio show. I remember feeling so relaxed, so comfortable. We were under-age, so, of course he didn’t plow us with adult beverages (we had our own on the tour bus, anyway), but he did offer us all of the soda and chocolate milk that we could drink! The interview was one of the best we’d ever done, or, at least on par with the Rick Dees and Ellen K bit we did in L.A., or that one time that we were the FIRST-EVER guests with an in-studio audience with JoJo on the Radio at KIIS (now a staple on his show).

Alas, it was all coming together, all making sense… I would invite old friends of mine from “the business”, discuss their old, current and upcoming projects, and cook some fun recipes with them! We’ve made everything from “Flintstone Ribs” to “B.L.T.A. Tacos” to “Sexi-Mexi Wraps”. That last one was gross (sorry, Nicole Macias, but you know it was!), but we’ve learned a lot along the way, and one of the most important things, food-wise, is that we ALWAYS have final approval on ANY recipes!

The first season was great, and the second season is shaping up to be even more awesome. Now if only I could get my old roommate, Josh Henderson, to come be a guest… But, he’s playing John Ross Jr. on the new “Dallas” now, so, my efforts may be futile. However, I DID help him move to L.A., let him live with me until he got on his feet, and hooked him up with Ashlee Simpson, so that MAY be worth SOMETHING.

Tommy “Tommy Mac” McCarthy

http://www.twitter.com/tommymac79

https://www.facebook.com/TommyMacSongs

https://plus.google.com/u/0/108821772975670182328

www.snackyshack.com

http://twitter.com/snackyshack

http://facebook.com/snackyshack

http://snackyshack.tumblr.com/

 

 

Photo credit: Tommy McCarthy

That’s exactly what I did.

I hopped a train to the Upper West Side of Manhattan to chat with Jonathan Tropper, bestselling author of “The Book of Joe” and “This Is Where I Leave You,” which will become a feature film sometime in the near-future. His other novels are: “Everything Changes,” “How to Talk to a Widower” and “Plan B”. Click the links to read summaries.

I’m a longtime fan of Tropper’s funny, irreverent and soul-scratchingly beautiful novels filled with real, flawed, and as he says, “over the top” characters. He’s a fabulously witty writer who’s hypersensitive to detail; he can see right through fake people. This guy’s the real deal.

As opposed to (dare I say it) “crap” fiction filled with clichés and flat, one-sided characters, Tropper’s novels brim with multi-dimensional, realistic and often painfully human characters who make bad life decisions and speak before they think. While reading his books, you enter into a sort of relationship with the characters, particularly the male narrators.

And that’s one of the reasons I’ve decided to feature Tropper in Holly Pinafore™ Magazine.

Tropper certainly knows how to change the woman’s perception of man as the stereotypical heartless, insensitive “douche bag.” In his own way, he teaches us ladies that there’s more to men than boxers and a you-know-what. The guys in Tropper’s novels are, in some way, emotionally screwed up, self-deprecating dudes who show us what life is like from their perspective. Through Tropper’s truthful portrayal of men as flawed but sensitive human beings, we realize that even when they stumble, they’re worthy of a second (or third…or fourth) chance. Just as with a boyfriend or a husband, or even a brother, sometimes you want to slap them. Other times, you want to hug and squeeze them and tell them how much you love them. Why? Because as imperfect and f-ed up they are, the uber-talented Tropper inconspicuously peels away the layers of their sarcasm, bitterness, crudeness and whatnot, eventually revealing to us that these sometimes-thoughtless schmucks are actually lovable. They’re human. Just like us.

ON WRITING

When I asked Tropper why he became a writer (other than the obvious amazing talent), he said, “I wasn’t good at anything else. Math wasn’t going to do it for me. My mother always thought I’d be a psychiatrist because I was good at analyzing people.”

But Tropper, a longtime piano player, admitted that his initial dream was to become a rock star. Unfortunately Tropper never found his permanent place in the spotlight. “I was always the guy who couldn’t join the band because they never had a damn piano,” he said.

Tropper, who still plays every day, began to occupy most of his time with another kind of keyboard. This time, instead of ticklin’ the ivories, he’d be ticklin’ his typewriter (a.k.a. ticklin’ our souls with his writing).

“[Writing] was the only thing that was left in me,” he said. “I just didn’t imagine that I’d get paid to do it.”

What made Tropper so successful? Well, he says it best: “I kind of write the way I speak. I’m trying to write [fiction] truthfully in the way that people know exactly what I’m talking about.”

He doesn’t ramble with effusive prose or stuffy diction. He comes right out and says what he wants to say. It’s therapeutic, probably for him, but most of all, for his readers.

Another factor contributing to his success is his good ear for conversation and love of social interactions. “I’m fascinated by people,” he said. “I think I would have been a good shrink. I just couldn’t have gone to medical school.”

Tropper added, “I’m very interested at the way people are talking to each other or aren’t talking to each other, or find ways to front or find socially acceptable ways to brag…or you know, flirt, or any of that…I just love watching the behavior of people.”

But he thinks his keen awareness of society is sort of a curse: “I watch people’s behaviors and get irritated easily by people’s inability to tell the truth or see the truth. Makes me sort of a misanthrope. You know, you’re over people. And at the same time it makes me conscious of my own behavior. Sometimes I feel like such a f—ing hypocrite.”

Ah. Don’t we all?

Through his (sometimes brutal) honesty, he gives readers a juicy slice of life. He explains, “If you do it well, you’re giving people, like, touchstones that they relate to. I was watching a Simpsons episode where somebody said something to Homer. Homer laughs and says, ‘It’s funny because it’s true.’ Same goes for Tropper’s books.

Jonathan Tropper is no Nathaniel Hawthorne or F. Scott Fitzgerald. We don’t expect him to be. We’d cringe if he were. It’s Tropper’s character empathy and profound sense of humanity that makes his work so great, at least in my opinion.

“I don’t think I’m terribly effusive or turn a mean phrase,” Tropper said. “I think it’s more about that I just know how to write about people.”

Right he is. And write he does.

To purchase his books, visit the Jonathan Tropper section of Amazon.com by clicking here.

Photo credit: Elizabeth Parker Tropper

I first heard this quote in high school, when I watched my now-favorite movie for the first time, “Kamikaze Girls. “ The film’s protagonist, Momoko, says this to her mother who is questioning getting a divorce and risk leaving her daughter. Momoko responds by saving “Humans are cowards in the face of happiness. You need courage to hold onto happiness. Don’t miss your last chance to grasp it.”

At first, even though she was a fictional character, I could not wrap my head around Momoko’s words. It seemed so profound, unlike anything I had ever heard before. After all, don’t we as individuals tend to pursue what makes us happy without any hesitation? I always thought that was how I lived my life – without holding myself back from anything; certain of myself, my interests, and would do anything to pursue my dreams.

Nearly five years later, I finally understand how humans are truly “cowards in the face of happiness.” This revelation came to me thousands of feet in the air, when I was on an Osaka bound flight from New York to pursue my lifelong dream of studying in Japan. Both the Japanese language and culture have been interests of mine since I was a child, so I certain that when the moment came for me to travel to Japan I wouldn’t be anything aside from ecstatic.

But as I sat there on the plane, alone, distracting myself from the reality that lay ahead of me with a good book, I realized I was absolutely terrified. I’d be arriving in a new land where I did not know anyone and leaving my family, friends, and loved ones behind for four months. Even though this was what I had been dreaming of for over 10 years and I knew I would come to cherish the experience that waited for me, the lump of fear in my throat wouldn’t go away no matter how hard I swallowed and my heart couldn’t help dropping to the pit of my stomach.

That, I realized, was what Momoko meant when she said “Humans are cowards in the face of happiness.” Although we all have our own unique passions, hobbies, and interests that drive us to pursue our goals and dreams in live, when we finally get to that point of attaining that goal we find ourselves frozen with fear. Disbelief that our dreams are finally becoming a reality. Fear of the unknown and what will happen next when we finally take that step. This can be applied to anything – applying for that long-sought for dream job, moving away from home for the first time, or even starting a new relationship.

However, it is our own determination that allows to swallow that ball in our throats, to take the next step, walk through the doors to a new office, pack and unpack our lives, or start sharing it with someone we’re bound to fall in love with.

So, dear Holly Divas, don’t be a “coward in the face of happiness” – take the chance, go ahead what you love, and I guarantee while it may be frightening, you will end up finding happiness.

Photo credit: Flickr User Lilli Rang

What I mean by this is that the more we mask the feelings of our loneliness, the lonelier we get. Okay, okay, this is confusing. Let me explain.

Here it is, we begin to put off hanging out with other friends, which in turn limits the possibilities of actually meeting someone. If we try to fill a relationship void by hanging with the so-so “decent” guy who may like us (but that we have zero feelings for), people around us will start to think we’re taken. When we do this, we limit ourselves just so we can avoid the feeling of loneliness…But guess what? It’s okay to feel lonely, it’s a part of life. When we do feel lonely we should then do something proactive about it, rather than passively hanging out with a mediocre place filler. But what do many of us do??We hang out with the mediocre place filler!—the person that we’ll go out with because we think there’s no one else around.

You may think this is mean and rather snotty to call these people “mediocre place fillers,” because, after all, they may be very nice. But really, which ever way you turn them, they’re just not your type…and you know it. So, stop keeping them around at your own leisure, it’s selfish and in actuality, you’re limiting them as well. While it’s true that we (ladies especially) love to be treated for dinner every now and again, wouldn’t you rather go out for a fun evening with your friends than talk nonsense with a guy you know you don’t want to take home?

This leads me to my next question: how do we distinguish what’s real from what’s not? How do we know who is relationship material and who isn’t? After a recent break-up with a guy I fell quite hard for, I can’t seem to shake that natural intuitive feeling that I felt when I was with him. This isn’t to say that I can’t feel the same way with anyone else, but in the words of Michael Bublé, “I just haven’t met you yet.” Dinner after dinner, drink after drink, I still have not yet found anyone to evoke that certain spark that, well, came so organically with my last boyfriend.

Initially when we meet someone, a potential candidate to be our significant other, we want to feel excited. Why should you have to have a pep talk with yourself before heading to grab some grub with your new beau? You all know what I am talking about, because we are all guilty of this. These are not feelings of nervousness; these are feelings of anxiety. There is a big difference between the two. Nervousness emerges when you’re getting ready for a date with someone you’re genuinely attracted to, but you know when you get the thought, “maybe I’ll stay home instead” or “I feel bad not going out with this guy, because I don’t want to hurt his feelings,” but honestly, if you’d rather stay home alone than hang out with this person, well, Houston, we have a problem.

You know that feeling that you got when you started to hang out with your first real boyfriend?…Those days and nights when you spent every waking moment with them, only to do it again the next day? Yeah, those are real feelings. I’m so tired of playing the game. I want my feelings to be real; to mean something. I know I can feel that again, and quite frankly I have. So don’t let anyone try to tell you that you’re too picky. Besides, knowing what you want is sexy, so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

This brings me to my next point: never settle. Last night, as I sat and talked relationships with a friend over a candlelit dinner, the couple next to us was absolutely miserable. The saddest part of all was that these people couldn’t be a day older than 25. Is this what they thought was real? A silent dinner? Sad, but more often than not, people feel that this is how it is—that this is how it should be, but don’t let them fool you.

In a world where we cannot describe the norm, there is no reason to rush, to settle—to be in an unhappy and unhealthy relationship. No, not at all. Relationships aren’t easy. They take effort and dedication. But this must come from both people in the relationship, because, well, to use the cliché, it takes two to tango.

So ladies and gents, stay true to yourself and stop settling for people that you don’t see yourself with. And don’t date out of guilt or out of the thought that you might hurt the other person’s feelings if you say “no thanks.” Instead, have fun, be yourself, and everything else will surely follow.

Photo credit: “3 Girls and a Mic”

The “she” I’m referring to is Lilou Mace, who is perhaps one of the most genuine, adorable, sweet, inspiring human beings I’ve ever had the privilege to meet. She drives across the country in a bus marked “The Juicy Living Tour,” stopping in various places to interview famous motivational speakers such as Dr. Wayne Dyer, among others. Click below to watch my interview with her:

As magnificent and charismatic as she is, Lilou never calls herself an inspirational guru. She’s a humble leader and role model; she follows her heart, and ultimately, always triumphs by climbing out of life’s valleys to reach its peaks. Lilou’s second published book, “I Had No Money and I Liked It: The Abundant Journey of an Open Heart” is an honest, emotional account of her journey to happiness and soulfulness in an economically distraught society. She writes in diary / stream-of-consciousness form, explaining how she experienced doubt and sadness before finding great joy in trusting the Universe and opening herself up to abundance. Lilou expresses her own thoughts about money (especially in the aftermath of losing her high-paid job, which she chronicled in her previous book “I Lost My Job and I Liked It”) as well as the advice of others who’ve brought her comfort during her times of distress. Lilou delves into many areas, including “setting an intention,” “stepping outside your comfort zone,” “surrendering to what is,” “trusting the Universe,” and turning to good friends for genuine words of wisdom. She speaks candidly about her own inner voices of low self-worth and faltering self-esteem, and how she managed to pull herself out of temporary periods of depression. She’s never preachy or aloof; she’s just one of us–struggling with us, understanding us, inspiring us, and rising with us.

On HollyPinafore.org we teach people how to live a delicious life. Lilou Mace teaches others to live a “Juicy” life. I love this philosophy, because it’s similar to ours, yet it adds a different flavor that’s equally delightful. Please pick up a copy of her book by visiting Amazon or Lilou’s website. This is an absolute gem of a read that you need to get through today’s tough economic times. It’s also a wonderful story of self-realization that we all can use to carry us through the uncertain times in life, even those unrelated to finances.

We love you, Lilou!

Photo credit: Lilou Mace

Is there a certain amount of time one needs to be in a relationship before they are allowed to start thinking about the “M” word? I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about two years now, but considering we’re still in our early 20s I am afraid that if I bring up marriage it might freak him out. Is there a way I can bring the topic up without having it come across as “I expect you to put a ring on my finger?”

Sincerely,

Sleepless in New York

Dear Sleepless in Seattle New York,                                                                                                                                 

If you feel this relationship has what it takes to go the next level, then mimic married life. Make efforts to move in with one another. Get a cat together, or a ficus plant —or maybe go in on a New Mexico timeshare (no, don’t do that. I’m pretty sure those things are money pits).

The key here really is in the “effort making.” It will be less alarming for the boyfriend to talk about a potential pet than a potential diamond ring. If he seems onboard in taking these sorts of steps with you, it strongly indicates that he may be ready for the long commitment. The less receptive he is, of course the less pressure you should apply.

A strong marriage is a natural progression in relationships, and any good novelist would agree that actions speak louder than words. Pace yourself. You’ll allow more time for your relationship to mature, and for him to maybe even surprise you.

Sincerely,

1Guy

We all know someone who’s been through a divorce. StaceyLu is here to make weddings and marriages a whole ‘lot easier the second time around.

Here’s the 411 on StaceyLu:

Real Name: Stacey Tucker

Occupation: Headmistress of upstate NY boarding school for girls…no, wait a minute, that’s not right, I am confusing myself with Edna Garrett.

Hobbies:  Yoga, dancing, determined to become a better cook.

Special skills: I can wield a mean pastry bag

Education: Taught by monks in Poughkeepsie, NY. This one is true, my friends, aka the Marist Brothers at Marist College

Favorite Drink: Never met a cocktail I didn’t like

Why you’re an IT-Girl: Not to sound too Whitney Houston, better to sound too Chaka Khan, I am every woman. Being an It Girl means I can relate to you, and you, and you. I am the shy girl who didn’t have the dates in high school, so I sought out all the wrong male attention I could find. I am the girl who got married way too young and divorced a few years later only to be wrought with guilt and shame, judging myself for bad choices. I am the girl who found her dream man and has the dream life but knows there is something inside waiting to spill out and I can not rest until it does. I am the girl who takes care of everyone else first and says “it’s ok” when time runs out for the things I want to do. I am the wife, mother, daughter, friend, singer, dancer, writer, aerialist and goddess divine that every women standing and those currently on their knees praying is right now. We are all It Girls; we just need to know it.

What you love most about yourself: Recognizing that the story is always in the details of the scene.

What you love most about your career: It is mine to design, for good or bad. If it succeeds, it is because of me. If it fails, it is because of me.

Your favorite way to motivate people, particularly other women: To let them see my faults, my mistakes, my vulnerabilities. We are all so afraid to look foolish in front of others, especially other women. We think everyone else is perfect so we pretend we are, too. Once they see all my mistakes and see I can laugh about it all, they feel better about their lives as well, and can find the humor in the ugly stuff.

How you make a difference in your community: I am a member of the Weston Women’s League. We do a lot for the community in Weston, Connecticut. One of my favorites is Senior Lunch, which I have run for two years but recently passed the torch but still go and serve. We serve hot food to the seniors a few times a year. I get to wear an apron and get a steam facial from the crazy cafeteria dishwasher and smile at the seniors who don’t see enough smiles during their day. This year I am VP of membership, but that’s just a title.

Specific turning points in your life: Every time I snap out of my pseudo-depression because I feel I am not moving fast enough in my career. When I can acknowledge just how far I have come, that’s a turning point.

Something about you that most people don’t know: I love Kirtan music. Chanting, mantras…it really is transformative. Those that love me would say I have a big heart. Also, I published the essay “I Got A Boy” in Chicken Soup for the Soul New Moms edition in March of 2011.

Photo credit: Stacey Tucker

Ah, StaceyLu. Thank you for chatting with us at Holly Pinafore! We love the work you’re doing for women and can’t wait to see more.

Miss Stacey Tucker, a.k.a. StaceyLu, can be reached via Stacey@StaceyLu.com and via her website, www.staceylu.com.

All featured photos in this article © Stacey Tucker, 2011. All Rights Reserved.

With her Roy Orbison-inspired eyeglasses and June Carter-style dresses, Zooey puts a dazzling, blue-eyed spin on the fab fashions of the 50s. And let’s just put it this way: after all my hard work scouring the Web for her clothes and accessories, I’m really wishing Santa could tap into my Google search history. It would make his life a lot easier this Christmas. Hint, Hint!

Zooey’s signature style includes timeless yet-trendy outfits. My picks include Zooey-inspired deep-v halter dresses, frilly vintage dresses, high-waisted trousers and vintage plaid top and accessories such as Zooey’s quirky eyeglasses by Oliver Peoples. Don’t forget the cloche hat& vintage-style jewelry.

Find these and many of my personal ZD faves at stores like Urban Outfitters, Anthropologie and Modcloth. Ready, set, shop. Aaaand go!

Photo Credit: IdolImage.org

This program was originally founded in 2008 by Kristina Saffran, Liana Rosenman and Becky Allen, who met while in treatment for anorexia. The mission of Project HEAL is to: (a) raise awareness about eating disorders, as well as try and decrease the stigmas that surround them, (b) to promote positive body image, trying to diminish society’s obsession with body image in hopes to have individuals accept their bodies and (c) through the Help to Heal scholarship fund Project HEAL helps sends individuals to receive much needed treatment. These individuals generally have little to no insurance coverage, a large issue faced by many sufferers. Today Project HEAL has grown and has numerous Chapters and Kristina and Liana speak nationally about eating disorders, recovery and positive body image.

Jessica Jurinich is an eating disorders survivor who participates and volunteers wholeheartedly in this project. She says:

“I would like to think in even the smallest of ways that everyone can benefit from Project HEAL. The prevalence of eating disorders is so high that everyone really does know someone, whether or not it is an extremely close relationship. Along with the scholarship fund, which of course benefits the sufferer themselves and I in no way want to minimize that importance, treatment is paramount in overcoming an eating disorder and beginning on an individuals journey to recovery.”

Jessica stresses that the education about eating disorders is equally important. She says that society still often views anorexia and bulimia as only “text book” cases; they do not realize the gamut eating disorders actually run: “It is often difficult for family members to think their child is suffering because they do not seem ‘sick,’ they are not as thin as the picture shown in US Weekly and yet they may be very ill and in need of treatment. Through Project HEAL and the awareness we will spread, I hope to open many eyes.”

Jessica admits that although she has recovered significantly from her eating disorder, she still struggles with “hearing the voice” of her eating disorder and battles negative body image.

“Today, now that I am at my set point as far as weight goes, I do still struggle greatly with body image, not because I want to look like a celebrity, because I am lusting still over what I used to look like. Logically, though, I know that I could never sustain the life I am leading and look the way I used to look, so I know it will just take time, just as all other parts of recovery do, it takes patience, hard work and time,” says Jessica.

But there’s a lesson in this: many of us know that by helping others, we teach our struggling, imperfect, human (yet beautiful) selves the lessons and ideas that can be helpful in our lives.

As far as the standard placed upon women by society goes, says Jessica, “unfortunately that standard doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.” She adds, “I feel the work should be done within, within ourselves, the schools, communities, the more ‘ok’ we are with ourselves, the less impact society and its standards will have on us. We live in a culture of media, and given the rate of technology and advancement that will only grow more and more in years to come. I do not blame the media for eating disorders, I believe there is a largely influential piece but in no way do I place blame.”

She explains that when trying to figure out the “whys” of eating disorders, it’s important to always look at the whole picture and not just the parts. “It is so easy to place blame, one fight with a parent, oh blame the parent, reading a fashion magazine, that must be the cause. Truth is, eating disorders stem from a myriad of variables and from personal experience the variables even changed over the course of my illness, adding some, subtracting others,” she says.

I thank Jessica, Kristina, Liana and Becky for their courage, candidness and hard work. Please visit their website to learn more about the project and to participate in their fundraising events.

xoxo

Holly

Pictured Above: (Left to right) Jessica Jurinich, Kristina Saffran, Liana Rosenman