She’s been dubbed “The Oprah Winfrey of the Internet.” I can’t think of a more perfect title.

The “she” I’m referring to is Lilou Mace, who is perhaps one of the most genuine, adorable, sweet, inspiring human beings I’ve ever had the privilege to meet. She drives across the country in a bus marked “The Juicy Living Tour,” stopping in various places to interview famous motivational speakers such as Dr. Wayne Dyer, among others. Click below to watch my interview with her:

As magnificent and charismatic as she is, Lilou never calls herself an inspirational guru. She’s a humble leader and role model; she follows her heart, and ultimately, always triumphs by climbing out of life’s valleys to reach its peaks. Lilou’s second published book, “I Had No Money and I Liked It: The Abundant Journey of an Open Heart” is an honest, emotional account of her journey to happiness and soulfulness in an economically distraught society. She writes in diary / stream-of-consciousness form, explaining how she experienced doubt and sadness before finding great joy in trusting the Universe and opening herself up to abundance. Lilou expresses her own thoughts about money (especially in the aftermath of losing her high-paid job, which she chronicled in her previous book “I Lost My Job and I Liked It”) as well as the advice of others who’ve brought her comfort during her times of distress. Lilou delves into many areas, including “setting an intention,” “stepping outside your comfort zone,” “surrendering to what is,” “trusting the Universe,” and turning to good friends for genuine words of wisdom. She speaks candidly about her own inner voices of low self-worth and faltering self-esteem, and how she managed to pull herself out of temporary periods of depression. She’s never preachy or aloof; she’s just one of us–struggling with us, understanding us, inspiring us, and rising with us.

On HollyPinafore.org we teach people how to live a delicious life. Lilou Mace teaches others to live a “Juicy” life. I love this philosophy, because it’s similar to ours, yet it adds a different flavor that’s equally delightful. Please pick up a copy of her book by visiting Amazon or Lilou’s website. This is an absolute gem of a read that you need to get through today’s tough economic times. It’s also a wonderful story of self-realization that we all can use to carry us through the uncertain times in life, even those unrelated to finances.

We love you, Lilou!

Photo credit: Lilou Mace

“Humans are cowards in the face of happiness.”

I first heard this quote in high school, when I watched my now-favorite movie for the first time, “Kamikaze Girls. “ The film’s protagonist, Momoko, says this to her mother who is questioning getting a divorce and risk leaving her daughter. Momoko responds by saving “Humans are cowards in the face of happiness. You need courage to hold onto happiness. Don’t miss your last chance to grasp it.”

At first, even though she was a fictional character, I could not wrap my head around Momoko’s words. It seemed so profound, unlike anything I had ever heard before. After all, don’t we as individuals tend to pursue what makes us happy without any hesitation? I always thought that was how I lived my life – without holding myself back from anything; certain of myself, my interests, and would do anything to pursue my dreams.

Nearly five years later, I finally understand how humans are truly “cowards in the face of happiness.” This revelation came to me thousands of feet in the air, when I was on an Osaka bound flight from New York to pursue my lifelong dream of studying in Japan. Both the Japanese language and culture have been interests of mine since I was a child, so I certain that when the moment came for me to travel to Japan I wouldn’t be anything aside from ecstatic.

But as I sat there on the plane, alone, distracting myself from the reality that lay ahead of me with a good book, I realized I was absolutely terrified. I’d be arriving in a new land where I did not know anyone and leaving my family, friends, and loved ones behind for four months. Even though this was what I had been dreaming of for over 10 years and I knew I would come to cherish the experience that waited for me, the lump of fear in my throat wouldn’t go away no matter how hard I swallowed and my heart couldn’t help dropping to the pit of my stomach.

That, I realized, was what Momoko meant when she said “Humans are cowards in the face of happiness.” Although we all have our own unique passions, hobbies, and interests that drive us to pursue our goals and dreams in live, when we finally get to that point of attaining that goal we find ourselves frozen with fear. Disbelief that our dreams are finally becoming a reality. Fear of the unknown and what will happen next when we finally take that step. This can be applied to anything – applying for that long-sought for dream job, moving away from home for the first time, or even starting a new relationship.

However, it is our own determination that allows to swallow that ball in our throats, to take the next step, walk through the doors to a new office, pack and unpack our lives, or start sharing it with someone we’re bound to fall in love with.

So, dear Holly Divas, don’t be a “coward in the face of happiness” – take the chance, go ahead what you love, and I guarantee while it may be frightening, you will end up finding happiness.

Photo credit: Flickr User Lilli Rang

Dear One Guy,

Is there a certain amount of time one needs to be in a relationship before they are allowed to start thinking about the “M” word? I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about two years now, but considering we’re still in our early 20s I am afraid that if I bring up marriage it might freak him out. Is there a way I can bring the topic up without having it come across as “I expect you to put a ring on my finger?”

Sincerely,

Sleepless in New York

Dear Sleepless in Seattle New York,                                                                                                                                 

If you feel this relationship has what it takes to go the next level, then mimic married life. Make efforts to move in with one another. Get a cat together, or a ficus plant —or maybe go in on a New Mexico timeshare (no, don’t do that. I’m pretty sure those things are money pits).

The key here really is in the “effort making.” It will be less alarming for the boyfriend to talk about a potential pet than a potential diamond ring. If he seems onboard in taking these sorts of steps with you, it strongly indicates that he may be ready for the long commitment. The less receptive he is, of course the less pressure you should apply.

A strong marriage is a natural progression in relationships, and any good novelist would agree that actions speak louder than words. Pace yourself. You’ll allow more time for your relationship to mature, and for him to maybe even surprise you.

Sincerely,

1Guy

Anyone who knows us cartoon character gals knows we are really much more than ink on paper. We jump off that paper, full of life, intellect, and emotion. And so does Stacey Tucker, a.k.a. the adorable blonde, curly-haired caricature StaceyLu. Behind the irresistibly cute cartoon, though, the 38-year-old is a real woman–a hard-working author with flair and hip mother of one who’s gorgeous enough to make practically anyone go gaga. Her latest book, “Eat, Drink and ReMarry: StaceyLu’s Guide to Planning the Second Time Around” is a candid, funny, advice-filled manual to help take the stress out of getting hitched again. Because let’s face it, whether you’re in your late 20s, 30s, 40s or older, getting married a second time can be just as time-consuming and stressful as the first. StaceyLu’s book is packed with information on how to deal with everything from the guilt of wearing a white wedding dress to the gilt in the ceremony. In her matter-of-fact, witty tone, StaceyLu provides answers to popular questions about re-marriage after a nasty divorce and other questions such as how to hire a planner, pick the location, who to invite, and how to deal with the hullabaloo all over again without feeling too overwhelmed.

We all know someone who’s been through a divorce. StaceyLu is here to make weddings and marriages a whole ‘lot easier the second time around.

Here’s the 411 on StaceyLu:

Real Name: Stacey Tucker

Occupation: Headmistress of upstate NY boarding school for girls…no, wait a minute, that’s not right, I am confusing myself with Edna Garrett.

Hobbies:  Yoga, dancing, determined to become a better cook.

Special skills: I can wield a mean pastry bag

Education: Taught by monks in Poughkeepsie, NY. This one is true, my friends, aka the Marist Brothers at Marist College

Favorite Drink: Never met a cocktail I didn’t like

Why you’re an IT-Girl: Not to sound too Whitney Houston, better to sound too Chaka Khan, I am every woman. Being an It Girl means I can relate to you, and you, and you. I am the shy girl who didn’t have the dates in high school, so I sought out all the wrong male attention I could find. I am the girl who got married way too young and divorced a few years later only to be wrought with guilt and shame, judging myself for bad choices. I am the girl who found her dream man and has the dream life but knows there is something inside waiting to spill out and I can not rest until it does. I am the girl who takes care of everyone else first and says “it’s ok” when time runs out for the things I want to do. I am the wife, mother, daughter, friend, singer, dancer, writer, aerialist and goddess divine that every women standing and those currently on their knees praying is right now. We are all It Girls; we just need to know it.

What you love most about yourself: Recognizing that the story is always in the details of the scene.

What you love most about your career: It is mine to design, for good or bad. If it succeeds, it is because of me. If it fails, it is because of me.

Your favorite way to motivate people, particularly other women: To let them see my faults, my mistakes, my vulnerabilities. We are all so afraid to look foolish in front of others, especially other women. We think everyone else is perfect so we pretend we are, too. Once they see all my mistakes and see I can laugh about it all, they feel better about their lives as well, and can find the humor in the ugly stuff.

How you make a difference in your community: I am a member of the Weston Women’s League. We do a lot for the community in Weston, Connecticut. One of my favorites is Senior Lunch, which I have run for two years but recently passed the torch but still go and serve. We serve hot food to the seniors a few times a year. I get to wear an apron and get a steam facial from the crazy cafeteria dishwasher and smile at the seniors who don’t see enough smiles during their day. This year I am VP of membership, but that’s just a title.

Specific turning points in your life: Every time I snap out of my pseudo-depression because I feel I am not moving fast enough in my career. When I can acknowledge just how far I have come, that’s a turning point.

Something about you that most people don’t know: I love Kirtan music. Chanting, mantras…it really is transformative. Those that love me would say I have a big heart. Also, I published the essay “I Got A Boy” in Chicken Soup for the Soul New Moms edition in March of 2011.

Photo credit: Stacey Tucker

Ah, StaceyLu. Thank you for chatting with us at Holly Pinafore! We love the work you’re doing for women and can’t wait to see more.

Miss Stacey Tucker, a.k.a. StaceyLu, can be reached via Stacey@StaceyLu.com and via her website, www.staceylu.com.

All featured photos in this article © Stacey Tucker, 2011. All Rights Reserved.

Okay, fine. I’ll admit it. I watch the TV show New Girl for more reasons than the offbeat, screwball humor and blossoming chemistry between characters Nick and Jess. I watch the show more so to see what Zooey Deschanel is wearing. How can I—or anyone else—not crave her adorable geeky-chic look?

With her Roy Orbison-inspired eyeglasses and June Carter-style dresses, Zooey puts a dazzling, blue-eyed spin on the fab fashions of the 50s. And let’s just put it this way: after all my hard work scouring the Web for her clothes and accessories, I’m really wishing Santa could tap into my Google search history. It would make his life a lot easier this Christmas. Hint, Hint!

Zooey’s signature style includes timeless yet-trendy outfits. My picks include Zooey-inspired deep-v halter dresses, frilly vintage dresses, high-waisted trousers and vintage plaid top and accessories such as Zooey’s quirky eyeglasses by Oliver Peoples. Don’t forget the cloche hat& vintage-style jewelry.

Find these and many of my personal ZD faves at stores like Urban Outfitters, Anthropologie and Modcloth. Ready, set, shop. Aaaand go!

Photo Credit: IdolImage.org

The U.S. is peppered with a number of eating disorder recovery programs, but one in particular really made a huge difference to me. Introducing Project HEAL: Help to, Eat, Accept and Live.

This program was originally founded in 2008 by Kristina Saffran, Liana Rosenman and Becky Allen, who met while in treatment for anorexia. The mission of Project HEAL is to: (a) raise awareness about eating disorders, as well as try and decrease the stigmas that surround them, (b) to promote positive body image, trying to diminish society’s obsession with body image in hopes to have individuals accept their bodies and (c) through the Help to Heal scholarship fund Project HEAL helps sends individuals to receive much needed treatment. These individuals generally have little to no insurance coverage, a large issue faced by many sufferers. Today Project HEAL has grown and has numerous Chapters and Kristina and Liana speak nationally about eating disorders, recovery and positive body image.

Jessica Jurinich is an eating disorders survivor who participates and volunteers wholeheartedly in this project. She says:

“I would like to think in even the smallest of ways that everyone can benefit from Project HEAL. The prevalence of eating disorders is so high that everyone really does know someone, whether or not it is an extremely close relationship. Along with the scholarship fund, which of course benefits the sufferer themselves and I in no way want to minimize that importance, treatment is paramount in overcoming an eating disorder and beginning on an individuals journey to recovery.”

Jessica stresses that the education about eating disorders is equally important. She says that society still often views anorexia and bulimia as only “text book” cases; they do not realize the gamut eating disorders actually run: “It is often difficult for family members to think their child is suffering because they do not seem ‘sick,’ they are not as thin as the picture shown in US Weekly and yet they may be very ill and in need of treatment. Through Project HEAL and the awareness we will spread, I hope to open many eyes.”

Jessica admits that although she has recovered significantly from her eating disorder, she still struggles with “hearing the voice” of her eating disorder and battles negative body image.

“Today, now that I am at my set point as far as weight goes, I do still struggle greatly with body image, not because I want to look like a celebrity, because I am lusting still over what I used to look like. Logically, though, I know that I could never sustain the life I am leading and look the way I used to look, so I know it will just take time, just as all other parts of recovery do, it takes patience, hard work and time,” says Jessica.

But there’s a lesson in this: many of us know that by helping others, we teach our struggling, imperfect, human (yet beautiful) selves the lessons and ideas that can be helpful in our lives.

As far as the standard placed upon women by society goes, says Jessica, “unfortunately that standard doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.” She adds, “I feel the work should be done within, within ourselves, the schools, communities, the more ‘ok’ we are with ourselves, the less impact society and its standards will have on us. We live in a culture of media, and given the rate of technology and advancement that will only grow more and more in years to come. I do not blame the media for eating disorders, I believe there is a largely influential piece but in no way do I place blame.”

She explains that when trying to figure out the “whys” of eating disorders, it’s important to always look at the whole picture and not just the parts. “It is so easy to place blame, one fight with a parent, oh blame the parent, reading a fashion magazine, that must be the cause. Truth is, eating disorders stem from a myriad of variables and from personal experience the variables even changed over the course of my illness, adding some, subtracting others,” she says.

I thank Jessica, Kristina, Liana and Becky for their courage, candidness and hard work. Please visit their website to learn more about the project and to participate in their fundraising events.

xoxo

Holly

Pictured Above: (Left to right) Jessica Jurinich, Kristina Saffran, Liana Rosenman

Looking for a little more charm in your life? We’ve got just the ticket for you, dahling.

It’s my great pleasure to introduce Little More Charming™, an online boutique that sells one-of-a-kind studded charms, sequined wristlets, bedazzled flip-flops and other adorable-yet-glamorous items I love. And all of the items are reasonably priced, so I can get my bling without breaking the budget.

Founded in 2010 by Karen Paul, Little More Charming™ has already become a huge success, with trendy tote bags and jewelry items fit for young girls, tweens, teens and women of all ages.

But it’s not just the store we adore here at Holly Pinafore (corny, I know, but it just rolled off my tongue that way). We love and admire Karen, a vivacious mom and entrepreneur who decided she wanted to do something fun for a living. And indeed, she did.

Because, after all, what’s not fun about accessories?

“I do have an addiction to accessories and I have happily passed on that addiction to my daughter,” says Karen with a hearty chuckle. This woman certainly has a great sense of humor and a spunky, energetic vibe that seems to transmit through her products.

Karen explains that she practically grew up in the fashion industry. Her mother worked as Fashion Director for Saks Fifth Avenue and would stage elaborate fashion shows. Karen started helping out at the shows at age 12. “I loved the glitz and glamour,” she says.

But in adulthood, the closest Karen ever got to the fashion scene was by working as a talent agent as well as in the production office for the TV show “Knot’s Landing.”  Soon after her daughter Hannah entered kindergarten, Karen and her husband decided that Karen would retire to spend more time with their little girl.

“I have one child and one chance with that child,” says Karen. “It was very important for me to pick her up from school every day. I never miss any of her sports games.”

Many people think that full-time mommyhood leaves no opportunity for a woman to follow her dreams. But in Karen’s case, it seems the decision to become a stay-at-home-mom has brought Karen closer to the fashionista lifestyle she enjoyed as a child. The creation of Little More Charming not only gives her the opportunity to spend more time with her family, but it also allows Hannah and her friends the opportunity to participate in the brainstorming and designing of each accessory.

“I actually bring Hannah and her friends together for focus groups to ask them their opinions on different designs,” says Karen.

But Karen hopes to accomplish more through her business than just sales. “I would love for my daughter to see how you can start something from scratch and grow it into a successful business. I don’t think my business makes a difference in the world, but it is fun. And it lets girls be creative with the charms and the accessories.  Girls change accessories and clothes every half hour. This is perfect for them!  They can constantly change the charms around – add new ones, come up with different phrases or words to use on the products,” she says.

So,who’d have thought! After years of working behind the scenes, Karen was finally given the chance to shine—to put that extra special sparkle in the lives of girls and women.  We’re honored to put Karen and Little More Charming in the spotlight.

For most, thoughts of the holidays conjure images of turkey, tinsel and tryptophan comas. However, for others it may inspire anxiety, dread and general uneasiness over the thought of your overbearing family. If your family is anything like mine, upon entering Grandma’s house you’re inundated with questions about your love life, asked to borrow money and immediately shoved into a tiny kitchen with six other women while the males sit and watch football in the living room.

Over the years, I’ve mastered maneuvers to make it through those visits. Hopefully my suggestions will help or at least make you feel better about having a crazy family too!

1. Take a piece offering. Even if Aunt Whoever tells you she’s got it covered, score points by bringing a simple dessert or side dish. Just don’t bring something she’s already made because she’ll accuse you of thinking you make it better than she does. LOL!

2. Have an ally, a friendly face. My family tends to behave themselves when strangers are around. Even if your family doesn’t keep those annoying, “when are you going to get married,” questions to themselves, a friend to swap “WTF” glances is a God-send! If at all possible, make it a gay guy. The ladies will love his fashion tips and your mean, Neanderthal uncle will avoid the both of you.

3. Take your knitting with you. For one, it calms you down and you can use the needles as defense when your ornery male cousins pick on you. If you don’t knit, take whatever arts and crafts, A.K.A busy work, to keep your mind occupied and your heart rate down. “Woosah!”

4. Whether you’re coming in from out of town or just driving a few blocks, try to remember it’s only for a little while. Having light at the end of the long, dark, guilt trip tunnel helps keep things in perspective.

5. Speaking of perspective, try to remember that your family isn’t the worst. When all else fails, pop in a copy of “National Lampoon’s, Christmas Vacation.” It’s funny, festive and you’ll be thankful your family is only two-thirds as bad as the “Griswolds.”

In addition, keep in mind these few things NOT to do.

1. Don’t joke around with your overly sensitive brother. No matter what, he won’t think it’s as funny as you do.

2. Don’t drink too much booze. A little can take the edge off, but too much and you’re stuck longer to sober up.

3. Don’t answer the question if your somewhat plump sister asks if she looks fat. Don’t lie, but don’t tell the truth. Fake a sneeze and leave the room to blow your nose.

4. Don’t put yourself in the position to argue with a family member that will NEVER admit to being wrong. You end up with nothing but the desire to spike their mashed potatoes with rat poison.

5. DON’T SPIKE ANYONE’S FOOD WITH RAT POISON!

Family will always be family and chances are they love you a million times more than they are annoying. Even if it doesn’t seem so at first, family is a blessing. Here’s to you and your family and may you all have a happy and healthy holiday season!

Featured photo: 20th Century Fox / www.millionaireplayboy.com

Took me long enough, but I’m finally posting about the OpenSky pop-up gallery in SoHo that took place on Thursday, November 10. I am so lucky to have taken part in this swanky, sparkly cocktail party, packed with celebrity curators who hand-select items that are sold directly on OpenSky.com. Some of the curators on the OpenSky site include actress and eco-friendly diva Alicia Silverstone, motivational speaker/author Gabrielle Bernstein, style expert Jeannie Mai, celebrity chefs Lidia Bastianich, Bobby Flay, Lucinda Scala Quinn and Ming Tsai among others, along with a number of fitness experts such as Tony Horton and Jackie Warner. The posh and creatively decorated gallery featured the items chosen by these and other experts listed at OpenSky.

I partied all night, sipped the delicious Hi! brand prosecco and mingled with the fabulous crew of ladies and gents who attended. The amazing, inspiring individuals (and my new friends!) included OpenSky Community Manager / blogger extraordinaire Caitlin Heikkila (@BecomingBKLYN), makeup artist Miss Merli (@MissMerli), fashionista-stylist Marley Simone (@marleysimone) and healthy living blogger Grace Kim (@gracekelle). These are some truly gorgeous, talented and lovely girls with a great sense of humor and of course, fashion sense.

Me with OpenSky It Girl Caitlin Heikkila

I was so honored to be a part of this event and can’t wait to participate in more!

Lots of love and light!

xo

Holly

P.S. The OpenSky Pop-Up gallery is located on 477 Broome Street at Wooster Street and is easily accessible from the 6 train. Go have a look and see what you like!

I’m having a love affair tonight. With a band. But it’s not what you’re thinking…

Tonight, my awesome neighbor Lauren introduced me to the indie rock band “A Great Big Pile of Leaves.” And guess what? I dove right into ‘em.

The Leaves’ music is sexy, sweet and extremely memorable. The combo of lead singer Pete Weiland’s powerful yet seemingly effortless vocals along with a clean vintage-sounding rock guitar, jazzy drums, and warm bass make each song so inviting – sort of like a colorful Brooklyn café on a winter night.

The name of their free-to-download album is called “Have You Seen My Prefrontal Cortex”–it’s perfectly tongue-in-cheek like the rest of the album. Out of the 11 tracks, my favorites include:

“Bring Back Breakfast:” This is basically an ode to cereal. Yep. Cereal. And it’s heartbreakingly adorable in all its simplicity. Perfect song to wake up to. The chords in this song give me chills and the lyrics make me laugh. I want to cry, ah! Listen:

See what I mean? Isn’t it great?

“I Will Gobble You Up”: To all the foodies out there who can’t wait to indulge in their favorite treats this Thanksgiving…this one’s for you. Some might think this song’s a dirty love metaphor, but I don’t get that vibe from it at all. I get innocent, fun and childlike humor in this delicious tune. (Dearest, Pumpkin, Why did you have to leave? / Red velvet, You looked so sweet, / Met some of your friends, / You I can’t wait to meet. / The taste of your favorite thing, / It will become a memory. / Hey tasty, come to me! / I can be your memory, Come to me!)

“Learn to Share”: This song captures the melodies of a great coffeehouse, a sexy New York jazz lounge and a head shaking rock concert all in one package. Slow and mellow at first, it begins with Pete singing to a spider dangling from a string: “Spider, why are you hanging around? Spider, ooh, why you hangin’ around? Get out of the kitchen. And go get a job. It’s not fair…for you to live here…hanging on by barely a thread at all. Hangin’ on by barely a thread at all…”

Listen here.

Be sure to check out the rest of the free downloadable tracks, including “Alligator Bop,” “We Don’t Need Our Heads,” “Vampires in Love,” “A Few Screws Loose” and “Great Fun” among others.

I’m not going to continue to describe my observations in some elitist kind of music critic manner. I’ll be direct and honest: this album is fantastic. It gets you out of your head and into your happy place. You can sing these songs while you’re in the shower, while you’re typing boring emails at work or while taking shots of tequila with your buds. That’s how versatile and fun this stuff is. Thanks to lead vocalist / guitarist Pete Weiland, drummer Tyler Soucy and bassist Tucker Yaro for bringing the “Leaves” to life. You guys are awesome.

Show this band some love by visiting their website, www.agreatbigpileofleaves.com.

And check out this cool interview on the website NJUnderground.com.

‘Gotta share that love!

xo

Holly

Cover art photo and videos courtesy of A Great Big Pile of Leaves.